Diet Tips for Women From Men
By Bev Bennett
Coauthor of Barron’s Dictionary of Healthful Food Terms (Barron’s, 1997)

When David Conroy decided to lose some weight on a bet, he did it like a
man.

“I thought about how to go about it and decided I needed to start
exercising,” said Conroy, an assistant professor of kinesiology at Penn
State University in University Park, Pa.

“I decided I wouldn’t stop eating — I like to eat, but I wouldn’t eat as
much.”

A year ago, he won $300 in his family’s weight-loss pool and went from 190
to 165 pounds.

That’s typical of the way men lose weight, says colleague Kristine Clark,
R.D., director of sports nutrition for the university. “When men want to
lose weight, they do.”

Clark, who works with highly competitive athletes, suggests taking a look at
men’s and women’s magazines to see how differently men and women approach
their bodies. A typical men’s magazine probably has an article on fitness.
But it doesn’t have the relentless stream of diet advice that one finds in
many women’s publications.

“Dieting is a daily thought process for women,” she says. “Women, myself
included, are breathing our weight every day. Basically, we are neurotic
about this. It’s completely different for men. They look at their bodies,
get disgusted, say they’ll lose weight — and they do. They don’t immerse
their souls and their psyches in dieting. They just want to lose weight and
they want to know how to do it.”

When a family member suggested that Conroy was getting a little chunky, he
agreed and went on a diet.

A woman wouldn’t be so agreeable, even if the criticism was meant to be
helpful, said Clark.

“Women might know they’re a little heavy,” she said, “but if a spouse or
friend pointed it out, they’d be horrified and angry.”

Conroy didn’t think he was being personally attacked. He didn’t think his
weight had anything to do with who he was as a person. He was being told he
should lose weight, and he promptly did, making just three changes in his
lifestyle.

He ate all the things he wanted, but less of everything. For example,
instead of his hamburger, fries, cookie and a soft drink for lunch, he had a
burger and a soft drink. When going out to eat, he ate only part of a pizza
and brought the rest home for another meal.

He started playing squash with another faculty member, which was a big
increase in his exercise.

And he cut out his daily snack — a large milkshake before bed. That alone
probably accounted for a pound a week in weight loss.

Wow! The amazing Mr. Conroy. What a star. What a superiior person.
He showed us girls how to do it.

All I have to do is cut out that large milkshake before bed—-kind of
hard because I do not eat milkshakes, cake, candy soda or for that
matter fries or even fatty hamburgers. I watch portion sizes and eat
only whole foods, testing my blood sugar and blood pressure all day.
Zonkers, I am having a devil of a time losing weight. But all Mr.
Conroy does is cut out some of the junk and bingo, he loses weight.

Next he plays squash every day. How old is Mr. Conrooy? Is he single
or does he have kids at home waiting for him to finish up his squash
game? I doubt very much that Mr.Conroy is preparing many of his own
meals. It sounds like he can afford to eat out. I don’t think he is
in the kitchen all day facing a full refrigerator and preparing three
meals a day for a family.

What about that testosterone Mr. Conroy has surging through his body.
You know—that stuff that produces muscle which burns up more
calories than fat. If he is married, did he gain weight with each
child he produced. Oops, sorry, it is only women that nature designed
to hold onto fat to protect the growing fetus.

Of course he obsessed less about his weight. In our culture a man is
not usually judged by his appearance. Women are.

Any of you women out there impressed by Mr. Conroy?

No, I’m not impressed by Mr. Conroy. I don’t want to hear any more
stories about Mr. Conroys……..

My husband and I started Weight Watchers the beginning of April. He has
lost over 25 pounds and I’ve lost 10 in the same period. Very seldom
have I gone over the points allotted to me each day. We both took a
hiatus when we were on vacation for five days.

I agree, Dolores, it’s a struggle. He is fanatical about it once he
gets started, though. I’ve been through this so many times it’s hard to
be fanatical. He goes on and on about “how many points should I could
this for” and worries over every damned one of them until I just want to
scream! Men just don’t realize that for women it’s different. It’s a
huge struggle with results coming very slowly. It’s hard to stick with
it, as our life stressors are different and our ways of going about
dieting are different. They also don’t have this “appearance” thing
going on in the same way as women do.

I’m still doing it because I have to. I figure that, without his going
on the diet, I would still be ten pounds heavier, so I’m ahead.

Mens’ muscle mass does make it easier for them to lose. His being 6’4″
helps a lot, as he has much more muscle mass than I do at 5’5″.

Good luck to you, Dolores. I’m right there behind you.